Do you ever get caught up looking at someone who is ahead of you?
Maybe they have more followers, or are making more money, or have more experience, or wisdom. Or maybe they have children when you're hoping to start a family, or a partner when you're ready to meet someone.
It's very human, the desire to not be left behind.
We want to feel connected, and we want to keep pace with those around us.
So, we start speeding up.
Often we start moving at a pace that is unnatural to us, trying to direct our lives where we want them to go.
The problem is when we do that, we miss out on the beauty and lessons we are meant to receive on the path at the pace right where we are at.
Our nervous system has a hard time adjusting to this new pace. Our heart beats faster, it can begin to feel unnatural, and constrictive.
Or maybe we notice we are expanding at a rate that IS natural for us, and we see someone we love moving at a different pace and we want to slow ourselves down to meet them.
It's important here to recognize, and ask, "Am I changing my pace form a place of love, to enjoy deeper connection?"
or "Am I slowing down out of a sense of obligation? Am I limiting myself from my fullest expression?"
I realize now I would never want to hold someone back from the fullness of their expression, and the beauty of finding their own natural pace.
My new goal is to find peace in life exactly as it is. To move at a pace that is natural for me. To celebrate others at the pace they are at, without it needing to reflect anything about me or where I'm at.
Growing up I was the youngest in my family and when we went on hikes I often had a fear of being left behind.
I recently realized I was living a lot of my life at a pace that was unnatural for me, simply out of that fear. (It especially came up when I went on hikes with someone who walked faster than me!)
When I sat to investigate the feeling underneath, it was a fear of being alone.
And I was able to remind myself that aloneness isn't a scary thing.
It's actually much more painful and difficult to leave myself than to keep up with others out of the fear of being alone.
One of my favorite quotes is, "Loneliness is the absence of the other. Aloneness is the presence of one's self." ~ Osho
When we trust in life, in ourselves and our path, we meet the lessons we are meant to learn at the right time.
When we surrender to walking at our own pace, life becomes an art. We have time and space to receive the lessons, the beauty and the joy.
2020 gave me the gift of slowing down, and finding my own pace.
Sheltering-in-place gave me the opportunity to simply be on the land, connect more with the garden, the neighbors, and the quiet whispers of my heart.
As we step into the New Year I invite you to consider:
Where have I been moving at someone else's pace?
Where have I been afraid of being left behind?
Where have I limited myself out of a fear of leaving someone else behind?
Our souls all have a journey to walk and a pace that is perfect for us.
When we develop comfort and peace in the natural unfolding, we learn it's ok to be left behind. It's also ok to expand more quickly than those around us.
We learn to stop leaving ourselves, and the path we are meant to walk.
This year, may we find our own natural pace.
May we find peace in seeing the people who are ahead of us.
May we celebrate the fullness of their expression.
May we cultivate compassion for those who are at a different place on their path.
and may we live into the fullness of the exact right pace we are meant to walk.
With love,
Meredith
