385 Pages of

Pure Love + Devotion

Connect to Stillness and Love Within

A place where there is nothing you need to change.

A place where you can love yourself no matter what thoughts, challenges or situations arise. 

Be and breathe through your challenges.

Honor the  feminine, a state of resting into the beauty of who you are.

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In 2010 I moved to San Francisco, following a vision I had while lying in savasana in a packed New York City yoga studio.  I had lived in New York my whole life and was following a masculine model of achieving and doing. I often found myself with stress, exhaustion with chronic pain and headaches.

Yoga provided the first experience for me to “Just be.” For the first time I learned to sit with the uncomfortable sensations in my body and breathe into them.  I allowed myself to feel the difficult emotions of a break up, the self-consciousness I held around my skin breaking out, how inadequate I felt not being able to find stable work, and how difficult it was to be trying to fit into the mold of a society that I knew in my heart was not for me. It was in yoga class where I first discovered to ‘just be’ and in that space - I began seeing visions.

Through listening to one of these visions, I moved to San Francisco and started a new life.

Sharing a reading in Berkeley, CA

Sharing a reading in Berkeley, CA

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Ten days after being in San Francisco a man walked up to me in a park and told me, “I don’t know why I feel the need to tell you this, but I’m going to see a saint this weekend, and I think you’re supposed to go…”

That saint happened to be Amma, an Indian guru who travels around the world giving people hugs.

Within a few months I was cutting off all my hair and found myself on a plane to India, on a quest to seek love within rather than outside of myself.  I lived there for six months visiting spiritual teachers and gurus. Amma’s ashram was the first place I landed.

The book shares the meaning of eleven mantras (each chapter title begins with one) and teachings from the Far East. But even more than that, it’s a love story. I fell in love with a man who was a devotee of Osho, and he consistently challenged my beliefs and conditioning on how I thought a relationship needed to look.  

In the end of the book, I find myself again with a broken heart, but this time, I had learned to forgive. I learned that I was 100% in control of my own happiness, and as much as I wanted to control other people’s thoughts and actions, I really deeply understood that I only had control of my own reactivity.

You get to see my evolution, how I handled my pain and my challenges from beginning to end. How I learned to be present in the moment. To let go of all the pressure I put on myself to fit in to a society that wasn’t working for me. I share about how I learned to meditate and how meditation softened me, and allowed me to “Just be” even more deeply through whatever arose.